Tuesday, August 31, 2010

MANGO Adventures

Today's Malaysia' Independence Day or is it Malaysia Day, I don't know. What better way to spend a nice sunny day with shopping with my favourite girls - my mom and sis!

Had a good gu bak mee at Green Hill Corner and off to The Hills we go. We stopped by at MANGO or MNG and my sis and mom decided to buy something there. I took the opportunity to try on some clothes cos I've always wanted to do that but never did! So I tried on these....
This was my favourite outfit to try! It's my first time to try layering. Turned pretty good! I shall call this my MNG Fall/Winter 2010 look. =)

I love the colour of the dress!

This playsuit is just so adorable! Prefect for our ever-summer weather!

I always had this crazy idea of trying on stuff that I can't afford. I mean, since I can't buy them, why don't try them on? And I got to do this today. When I got out, my sister asked if I wanted to buy. I just told her that if that's the case, I'd buy all three or the whole shop! Haha...MANGO's like heaven for me! I think I could mix and match and create a whole new outfit with the whole store!

Monday, August 30, 2010

Wandering Eyes

I'm back from the Church Camp! I have to say I learned many things. Despite the speaker being the Bishop of Kuching, he actually has something substantial for us this time around as compared to last year. Unfortunately, I did not prepare my mind for it so during his preaching, I was 'on' and 'off'. Overall, I had fun. =)

I also realized that the camera loves me during the camp. Unfortunately, I do not love the camera as much as it love me. I'm not that daring enough to show my true affection for it. In other words, I'm not that daring to pose radical poses. And I can't really give a beautiful face. I'm just so shy to! I tell myself that I'm not photogenic when I was younger and contact lens was not that appealing to me. I was very camera-shy, I did not like to appear in pictures. Now that I've blossomed and I do admit I do think I'm beautiful but I really need to embrace it! I think the reason why I don't really want to embrace it is because I'm so scared I'll become so full of myself and forget what TRUE BEAUTY is all about. I think it's important for me to focus on what's on the inside than what's on the out.

I am blessed to be beautiful. I have genes to thank for that! Haha. I found out from my uncle that I actually have Dutch blood. That's why some of my relatives have orang putih look. (Genes tend to skip generations by the way.) One of them happens to be me. It's both good and bad. The good is that I look unique. The bad is, I look very orang putih which means people can't tell that I'm a Bidayuh. Unlike most Asians, I am very proud to be an Asian and I want to embrace every Asian feature that I have. But I do have a feature that resembles my Asian-ness - I'm petite. It makes me feel very close to my grandmother because my dad's relative would say that I look beautiful and small like my late grandmother.

It's funny how international students were asking each other "where are you from?" And I'm surprised they ask the exact same question to me! Don't I look like my countrymen?? =( It does make me feel 'alien' when people ask me that. But I do feel a little sense of pride as well. It's bittersweet, really. Some thought I was Eurasian and some thought I was....Italian (???). Dior's French! Ah well.

I'm gonna miss my brother. :-'( The house feels empty again.

I have tumblr by the way!

Friday, August 6, 2010

Understanding Christine 101

The thing about me is.....I like to avoid problems. Because I think my life is already so complicated just as it is, I try to minimize the problems I encounter. Things that are worth complicating my life with, I will try to endure it. Things that are not worth even one second of my life, I'll just brush it off.

I'm a funny little thing back in school. Most girls would enjoy getting into fights. This girl doesn't like this girl and a huge he-said-she-said going on. Even though they look angry and say 'I hate her and why does this have to happen to me?!!', trust me, they enjoy every bit of publicity they get - even if it's bad publicity. As for me, I didn't wana trouble myself too much. Cos I acknowledge that my life is complicated enough that I know better than to get myself involved in a cat fight. It's just a waste of my time and my life. For a teenager I'm kinda matured compared to most. I have no idea why. Even I myself find myself weird. Thankfully, in most areas, I'm like any other normal teenager. Back then I was involved with lots of stuff. I had my studies to worry about. Church organizations, school activities. Thank God I wasn't in a relationship! The most memorable thing I did in my school life is struggling with the band accounts. Haha...all those paperworks and leadership roles I took is really challenging and I wondered how I got by. Seriously. Sad to say, I didn't do a very good job but I saw my flaws and hopefully in the future I am able to be better.

Now do you see why I don't like being involved in drama. With all those things going on, how can I possibly care bout petty things?? It just adds to the stress that I'm already under. I remember one time, a girl didn't like me because I was friends with her enemy. (Stupid right?) She said some really insulting things to my friend outside the toilet and me being me, I defended my friend lar. Start la ya....she wanted to 'wage war' with me. And I was like 'GREAT' *rolls eyes*. When I was nearby her, I can hear her talking bad bout me but I just ignored her. Say what she want lah, I've got no time for this. I was not going to give her the satisfaction of a reaction. She was like a dog barking at a tree. Do you know how satisfying that was? VERY! The opposite of love is not hate but not to care because when you hate, you still care to hurl insults at the person you hate. When you don't care, you don't acknowledge their existence at all. So which one is meaner? I'd say the latter.

I'm surprised that even after secondary school, she still detest me. While I totally forgot bout it. I do remember at times but thought how stupid it was. I mean, come on! After secondary school?? Really?? I've put that past behind me and there are more bitter memories than that like being ignored in class in Form 5 when it should be the time of my life. I'd say that is worse than being hated by someone I barely even know.

So...this is something about me. Hopefully it is interesting. I'm not like most girls and I hope to stay that way and keep my uniqueness. I won't lie to you, sometimes I do wish I am like any other girl but I understand the importance of making the right choices and I never regret any of the choices that I've made. Doesn't mean I never screw up either cos that's for me to know and for you to find out! ;-)