Happy Gawai 2009!!

Happy Gawai everybody!!

Well, for those from Kpg. Stass, that is.

Other people will start Gawai tomorrow!

=D

Such a joyous season.

Unfortunately, I am not celebrating. I'm not following my family to go down to Sri Aman for Gawai. Cos that's where we open house. But while I can't go down to Sri Aman, I went down to Kpg. Stass today! Woohoo! Now that is worth going to. Cos I haven't been there in ages! Man I love that kampung. So much has changed since I last visited.


So what will I be doing here in Kuching? I'll be doing my assignment. =( I know, can bring back to Sri Aman mah but no. It's a group assignment that's why I can't. I have to stay here in Kuching, meet up with my very innovative team to finish up an Innovation and Change assignment. I hate that subject. It's USELESS.


I really hope I can finish my assignment. Fears of the past come to haunt me. Cos knowing myself, I never really finish things. All my crochet projects I do, they never finish. As long as it's something long term, it never finish. And now this. This project is on-going and I really wonder whether I can finish it on time. Or maybe even earlier. But I think I'll do well. As long as I keep my eyes on the scholarship I want, I think I can.


That's about it. Once again, HAPPY GAWAI!!!

I Don't Wana Miss Out

Wow...back from Sibu for almost a week now and I haven't blogged about i! >.<" I'm sure you guys would like to know what I've been up to there.

Sibu's amazing I tell ya! I LOVE the food! It's super yummy and super cheap! I really miss that pork leg. The style of cooking is just so different! Shopping is super cheap too. So I've been stuffing myself with food and did a great deal of shopping.

Well, the highlight of it all is the annual State Level Marching Band Competition. And the champions are none other than St. Joseph Kuching. =D Lovely. I will upload pics regarding the Sibu trip in here and also in my Facebook page. And I will steal videos from Youtube. Hehe. I'll blog more on Marching Band later.

So what makes me quiet after my fantastic Sibu trip??

*Recuperating.

*Praparing for Engineering Maths (B) Test. Oh so gruelling! Been cramming my brain with numbers, numbers and more numbers!

*I had my very first facial yesterday. =) Wonderful I tell you!

So why am I working so hard for my test? I want good grades. I don't want to just pass. Last time I do but not now. I want to get a scholarship. I really do.

Lately I've been thinking and evaluating my life here in Kuching. It's nice, peaceful..... But then, I still think it's all too easy and I guess I've grown out of Kuching. Lately I've been wanting more. Lately I don't want to just settle with what's in front of me. I want more. It's not that I hate Kuching. I just think that I need to move on and go furthur since I think I am capable of it. I want to know how I'm really like without my family around me. I want to know how I'm really like when no one I know is watching me. I want to know who I really am, spread out my wings and continue being free-spirited and do things according to my own whim and fancy. Sounds selfish but....who wouldn't want that? =P

I feel that I am ready to part with my family and this land that I've known all these years. I want to see the world, explore a new culture, see people of different coloured skin and speak a foreign language. That is what I want. I want to be 100% independent. I am independent but can I make it on my own? This adventure that I want to embark in will either make me or break me but it will be worth the experience.


The scholarship that I was interested in has got offers to unis in UK, Aus and also US. But the universities that interest me more are the universities in Indonesia and Thailand. You all know how I would love to explore these countries. =D But I'm hoping to go to a University that has a marching band. A good one. So I guess America fits that criteria.


Well, all I can do is pray and ask earnestly for it and also work for it.

Oh God, I hope that You can grant this desire of my heart. I can't tell You to do this or that but if it is Your will, that'll be cool. Amen.

Ever feel like life has taken it's toll on you? Homeworks, assignments, activities AND home?

That's what I feel right now.

Everything is expecting so much from me.

I only have one thing to say...


LEAVE ME ALONE.


Lest I break down.

Oh wait, I just did. =)

Nice to see right?

Pressure me some more lah. =)

No Wonder

Engineering Physics Midsemester Test was this morning at 9.30am - 11.30am.

Now I know why my seniors complain.


IT WAS DARN HARD!!!


My head hurts after the test.

I felt like I was high on a drug that I couldn't walk straight.

It made me chant 'fail' as I walk out.

Funny how while I was doing my test, I kept saying to myself "I'm a smart girl. I can do this."

So much for being optimistic.



It's worse than Engineering Maths.

It's worse than any math I've ever encountered.

I am sure to fail.



Nuff said.

What Up?

I'm trying as hard as I can to keep my blog as updated as possible.

Now that I am supposedly free, I shall.

Hihi.

Okay. There're two main things that I wana blog about that I haven't. I have others to blog about but they're not so important.

Anyway, first things first.

Scribbles Of A Girl has now been blogging for a year, as of April 30th 2009.

Happy Birthday to my blog. Yay!!

The next thing is....

It was Mother's Day last week!!

And I didn't get a chance to blog about my wonderful mother!!! D=

Too busy with the preparations for the occasion and next thing I knew, I gotta prepare for my Physics 2 test this Saturday!!! D=

Anyway, I shall take this opportunity to tell you of my wonderful mother.

My mom is just so awesome!! When I was a kid, she was still working as a bank officer. She still manages to pick me up from school and cook lunch for me!! How cool is that?? It's amazing cos a bank officer has to stay at work from early morning and sometimes, late at night!! And to be able to take care of me amidst the crazy working hours, I gotta salute her man! And she still looks so amazing despite all that.

Eventhough she's not working now, she's still awesome. Despite not working in the bank nemore, she's very much involved with the church so she's kinda like working for free. But it's all good cos I can tell you that God really blessed her.

Ever since I was young, my mom would always point me to Jesus. When I was of age, she would drop me at Sunday School. No matter how hard I cried and say that I don't wana be left alone to go there, she would just leave me there to be independent and to know about this person called Jesus. Everytime I had a problem she'd always say "Pray about it." Most of the time I don't but in my subconcious mind, it sinks in and as I got older, I did eventually.

She would always encourage me to do whatever I want. She would send me for piano lessons, she would enrol me for Squash tranings, and also for GB. And when I joined Green Road School Band, she would send me every week and sometimes, everyday as competition draws nearer. For church, she encouraged me to join the music ministry and would send me faithfully whenever I am on duty.

My mom's cooking? Totally awesome! The best chef in the house and no one in the household could ever beat her cooking. Even my friends love her cooking. So, for those who like what I made, credits goes to my sifu - my own mother. I got a niche for cooking cos it's all inherented from my mother.

While she is very nice, she is also a very good disciplinarian. And when I say 'disciplinarian' I don't mean she goes about carrying a rotan. No. She doesn't.

She never cleans my room for me. Never wash laundry for me and never does anything that I can do on my own for me. All these, I have to do myself. If I don't do it, no one will. And that's the mentality she instilled in me since young to become independent.

Now, about going out. Did you know I never had a curfew in my whole entire life? Even when I was young? I can go back as late as I want. I'm serious. Ain't lying here. My mom never demand that I introduce to her my friends. I myself dengan sukarela, will introduce them to her. Cos I think that she should know who my friends are. Anyway, I want my mother to trust me and I also want to continue having no curfew. So I better be a good girl. And about calling, she doesn't really call to ask whether I'm going home or whatever. I'll call cos my mother brought me up to be a responsible girl. She'll call when I forget to.

But I wouldn't be who I am today if it weren't for my mother's constant prayers for me. I know she's praying for me every morning. Not just me, but for my father and also my other siblings. She brought me up in a way a Christian mother should and I thank her for that. I think if she never directed me to Christ, all those late nights could be used to sneak out with a boyfriend and doing something that I will regret. But because she introduced Christianity to me, God becomes real. And when God becomes real and I know His love for me, I can never bring myself to do anything bad in His eyes, not because I don't want to sin or because I wana obey my mother but because I know it will break His heart to see me do so.

It is not entirely my mother who made me turned out well but because of God who placed a wonderful mother into my life. A mother who leads me and directs me to Jesus. A mother who is so patient and loving. A mother who never yells but yet, the whole world still listens to her. And now I can tell you that my faith is my own, not programmed by my mother because I have gone through a phase where my faith is challenged and questioned.

And this is my mother. A gift from my God.

And when you care bout what people tell you.....



It brings you down.



HARD.

Some people just care too much what others say bout them. And this is turn, can affect other things namely friendship.

Just cos of something that other people said, they would just shove you off so that they can "clear their name".

Truth is, it won't work.

Truth is, it's a losing battle.

Truth is, it makes people say more.

What people think and perceive is forever planted in their minds, just by what they see. And it makes them imbeciles. And you'd be an imbecile too for allowing what they say affect you.

Not unless....

....
...
..
.


It is true.